Tender Parenting

Before we had Makfaui or I was even pregnant, George and I would observe how people parented...from strangers at the mall to friends and family. It was, and still is, a great exercise for us. It brings up discussions that we might not otherwise have. We are able to see natural childhood behaviors and how the parent(s) respond BEFORE it's our turn, then we can talk about how we would like to handle different situations. We're learning a lot by this purposeful observation.

Sadly, we see more bad parenting than we do good. Which is good for discussion, but sad for the kids. I think one of the things I see MOST often is moms who are out and about speaking rudely, snapping at or talking down to their kids for no apparent reason (like barking orders at them, not using a stern voice while disciplining). It really bothers me to see this and I want so badly to tell these moms that being nice would go a looooong way.

I recently witnessed some parenting that upset me a LOT (like maybe to the point of tears) and got me to think more specifically about what our parenting style is...or I guess what we want it to be, since 6 weeks is still kind of survival mode. :)

I've seen a lot of "hard" parenting lately. Parenting that I hope didn't start out that way-I think very few mommies and daddies look down at their totally precious baby and think, "Wow, I love you, but I'm gonna be a jerk to you soon and call it discipline." I think a lot of it comes from being tired, or lazy. Maybe a little selfish, or simply misguided. Whatever the reason may be, it's still wrong.

I know we aren't and can't be perfect parents. We can be really good parents though-parents who raise our child to the glory of God and by His grace. That means not lazy, not selfish, not mean or impatient, not ignorant to our child's development and abilities and not hard.

I look to scripture and see that God, the ultimate parent, and the only parent who truly sees the heart of His kids and has the right to be hard, is not. He is merciful, He is gentle, He is sacrificial. His discipline is firm, but full of love. Tender. Our God is so tender to us.

I've really been mulling over these observations and tough things I've seen lately. I think tender sums up the way I want to parent. I pray God will help me to be a tender mommy, I'm trying hard to be that to my sweet, sweet baby.