D is for...

Delali Rene!!

We had a wonderful naming ceremony today. Her name is Ewe (George's tribe) and means My Redeemer Lives! Rene is after my mom (and me!) and means Reborn.

My dear daughter,

I am so glad you are here! I don't think I have spent so much concentrated prayer on someone since immigration with your Daddy.

We loved you before you existed! Daddy and I prayed and prayed about the perfect timing for another baby in our family. I longed for you and asked God to give us the perfect child at the perfect time. I knew in my heart you would be my first daughter and I knew your name.

When we found out we were pregnant we were overjoyed, and then a little confused as big job changes were happening at the same time. We kept praying and giving our little family and lives back to God, all the while trusting and believing that you, our daughter, were meant for us and meant for now.

When you were only a little dot on the ultrasound screen, we had a major scare, and surgery that put your sweet little life at risk. I prayed and cried and prayed and cried for weeks and weeks, begging God to let us keep you, to let us hold you, whole and complete. I obeyed bed rest, I took my medicines, I did everything I knew to do, but ultimately, trusted in God and asked him constantly to let you be ours. I prayed your name over you daily, My Redeemer Lives, My Redeemer Lives.

When your cousin was born to heaven, I again had to look at my heart and see who/what I was trusting in. And again, I gave you back to God. But I begged Him to give you to us, whole and complete. I had no answers for this tragedy as I grew you inside of me, I only knew My Redeemer Lives.

As the weeks slowly crept by, I prayed for your health, your soul, your birth, your place in our family. I prayed that Daddy and I would be good parents to two kids. I prayed for provision for our growing family. I prayed that your brother would be prepared for a sibling. I prayed for peace over our anxieties. I thanked God that Our Redeemer Lives.

And then, you came! You came in God's perfect timing, whole and complete. Your birth was better than I could have imagined. Your Brother's little heart was definitely prepared for a sibling. God has given Daddy and I peace and wisdom as we begin to parent two kids. You are a complete and a total delight. I am overjoyed that My Redeemer Lives.

Now that you are here and I am getting to know you, I keep praying for you. I pray that you will come to know the Lord at a young age. I pray God gives you a compassionate heart. I pray that you continue to be joyous! I pray for your health and safety. I pray that you are curious and seek out the truth. Most importantly, I pray that you will come to recognize on a daily basis, no matter what your circumstances are that your Redeemer certainly does live. That He is near to us in our times of joy and sorrow, in plenty and in want. That He has not only saved us, but that He walks with us. I will never know the answers to life's really hard questions. What I do know, is that My Redeemer Lives and some days, that's all any of us has to stand on. I want you to be confident in that truth as you grow and take on this big, big world.

I love you my sweet Delali and I am so excited that I get to be your Mama!

1 Week

I can't believe our sweet girl is one week old today!!

At one week, we are still in awe of that super fast labor and completely wrapped around this little one's fingers!

She continues to be a very chill baby.

Her days and nights are confused, but I know it will pass & I'm so grateful that she sleeps at all-even if it is during the day!

Remember the last post I said something about tomorrow could be a bad day, but that's okay? Prophetic, yo. Today took an unexpected turn with a trip to the pediatrician. Baby Girl hasn't pooped since we left the hospital. For those not in the know, newborns are supposed to poop a lot...or at least a lot more than that! We went in for a weight check and she's only gained HALF an ounce in 4 days. :( Even though I nurse her on demand, I am not cutting calories (yet) and am drinking plenty, it's just not enough. So, for a little while (please God, just a little while) I will nurse her, then give her a small bottle of formula, then pump to increase my supply. I have cried a lot about this today. Mostly, it's the crazy hormone thing. Partially, it's feelings of failing my baby (for the 2nd time-this happened w/ M, only we didn't supplement and it took him 5 weeks to get back up to birth weight) and partially it's fear that we will have a really hard go like we did with M. Oh hormones! Speaking of hormones, after the Dr. we went to H-E-B to get bottle feeding paraphernalia and M dropped a can on my phone  (which I thought was hiding under the baby seat) and seriously broke it. Yes, I cried in the parking lot.

All in all, it's been an awesome first week. Despite this little set back, we have a happy, healthy family and are super blessed.

Now grow girl, grow!!

Ramblings from a 2nd Time Mommy

The boys have gone to church, Baby Girl is sleeping and I should be too, but I know she will wake up any second, so I'm just staring at her...and thinking...and blogging.

Today is her due date...and she's 5 days old! That's so awesome.

I am still in total shock and disbelief at how wonderful her birth and recovery has gone. I feel great! I don't think I felt like this until more than a month after Makafui was born!

I laughed unpacking my hospital bag at all the things I thought I needed, in preparation for a long labor. I brought a swimsuit top so I could labor in the tub. Ha! Pages and pages of hand written birth affirmations to help me stay focused and positive. Ha! Breath mints. Last thing on my mind! Stress relieving massage oil....um, I guess I forgot I don't want people to touch me when I'm in pain. Double ha! There were a few more funny things, but those were my fave.

Immediately after Makafui was born, and for many, many, many months after I was convinced he would be an only child and I would NEVER, EVER go through that again. About 24 hours after she was born, I thought, "Yeah, I could totally do that again." Cray cray, I know.

I am LOVING this stage of life and being a young mom to young kids. I LOVE having a crazy 2 1/2 year old and I LOVE having a newborn. I know I've only been doing it for a few days, but I am just savoring this piece of time, not wishing any of it away.

She is itty bitty! I love how she is just a sweet little bundle-SO much smaller than M was! She still likes to be balled up-like she was in the womb. So precious.

It's still weird to me to do things and realize, the last time I did this I was pregnant, and now I have this awesome kid!

I miss being pregnant juuuuuust a little bit, but I love having her here way more! I hadn't gotten to that miserable point in pregnancy yet, so it ended kind of suddenly.

I am a lot more relaxed this time. I'm not writing down when she eats or nervously watching her diapers or freaking out if she goes 3 hours between feedings one time and only 20 minutes the next. It's been good for all of us taking the more chilled out road.

I wondered how I would feel about a 2nd baby compared to my first. I wondered if things would seem "old hat" or if my love for one child would be greater than the other. It's true what everyone says, your love just multiplies! The only major different thing is that I'm not new at this and not a stress ball. I still study her like I did with my first. I still soak in her smell and watch closely for those sleepy smiles. I still thank God for her and sit in awe at the perfection He has given us. She is still new and wonderful, even though it isn't the first time.

She is such a girl! Everything about her is dainty in comparison to her big brother. She has little ladylike hands and fingernails, whereas his have always been paws! Her yawns and stretches and sleepy noises are just more feminine.

There is something about her face and eyes that just light up with joy. I know that sounds a little silly because newborns are just newborns. But she isn't. Her eyes just light up like she has a secret or something.

I'm  pretty sure G will go back to work tomorrow. I am slightly, just slightly nervous for my first day with both kids alone. I'm sure we will do fine and having appropriate expectations is a must, but that's a looong day!

I am just so impressed by Makafui! He is so loving to his sister and he seems to genuinely care for her and like her! He gets a little crazy in the afternoon, but it's more stir crazy since we aren't doing the normal things we used to do, rather than an acting out kind of crazy.

I know tomorrow could be the complete opposite of these wonderful days we have been having, and that's okay too. Life is just sweet right now and I am just so so blessed and overwhelmed by God's graciousness to us!

The First Days in Pictures

Unlike Makafui's birth, I did not look or feel like I had been hit by a truck afterwards. Still can't believe how fast that went!!

First picture and getting checked out.

Meeting Gigi for the first time!

Pretty flowers that died too quickly. :(



Our first selfie...shameless.

So blessed by how enamored he is with her!

Everything about this picture just cracks me up.

Thank God, she takes a pacifier!

Love that milk drunk face.

She's HERE!!

Our sweet girl gave us the best surprise ever and came just a little bit early! Her due date is the 24th and she arrived August 19th instead...yay Baby!!

Sweet Baby "Pax" 7lb 2oz, 18.75''

She is already a total rockstar and I am still just in awe and feeling totally blessed by how this week has gone.

After the loss of my niece earlier this year, I was experiencing a lot of anxiety about the final weeks of pregnancy, delivery, etc. After much thought, prayer, tears and discussion, I decided to be induced on the 20th. My Dr. thought I was a good candidate for induction and we were feeling pretty good about the decision. I still wanted her to come on her own though and was continually praying for God's perfect timing.

On the 19th, I woke up ready to have a great "last day" with just Makafui. I was having some contractions here and there, but they weren't painful and they were very random in their spacing and length of time. I was hoping it could be a sign of impending labor, but busied myself with our day since I knew she'd be coming the next day anyway. We went to the Y, got our favorite kolaches and hit up a park with Tiffany and Hannah Kate. Then, we headed home to eat lunch and have a rest time.

When we got home, I decided maybe this could be the day and I absolutely could not have a baby without a clean home. So I put a load of laundry in, started the dishwasher, cleaned the bathrooms and vacuumed the apartment. Just as I was finishing up vacuuming, my water broke, but not in a Niagara Falls sort of way, so I wasn't positive! I didn't want to make a big deal about it, head to L&D and then find out that I had peed myself-that would be SO EMBARRASSING! And, my contractions still didn't hurt and still weren't regular.

This was about 12:45. I called the Dr. and left a message with the nurse, then called G and told him he should probably come home. My mom and dad just happened to be having lunch together and just happened to check in on me when all this went down and soon my dad came and got M.

From the time I first suspected my water broke, to talking to the nurse and G getting home (30ish minutes) my contractions really started to intensify!

I met G in the corridor and we drove across the street to the Dr. After cracking some jokes, the Dr. got serious and asked G how fast he could drive to the hospital! I was so excited!

We had to stop 3 times on the way to the car for contractions, and then we sped off to the hospital in complete shock that this was actually happening-and so quickly! When we got to the hospital, we had to stop 4 or 5 times in the parking lot, lobby, elevator and hallway for contractions. It was all very intense, but it didn't sink in that she would be coming so soon-my mind was ready for another 6 hours or so. We got to the hospital at 2:20. At 3:53 she was in my arms!! (It sounds super easy, but I won't lie, the last 30 minutes or so were absolutely hellacious)

I still can't believe it worked out that way. I pushed through 2 contractions and she was here! She cried just enough for us to feel reassured, but has been pretty chilled out since.

The entire experience-her birth, the recovery, Makafui's reaction/role as a big brother and transitioning to home have been way better than I expected, but more so, even better than I could have wished for!! I am just so blessed and overwhelmed. We had a great first night at home and Makafui is just completely in love with and obsessed with her! He had a rough time sleeping while I was in the hospital, but last night he did great!

Her naming ceremony is on the 31st and I just can't wait!

 

Makafui 2.5

M is now officially 2 and 1/2!

His stats from today's well check: Height, 38" 93%!! Head, 39.9cm 67%. Weight, 31lbs 65%...geez, he feels a lot heavier!!

I was curious to see his stats as he suddenly seems to be much taller than his peers and has outgrown ALL of his shorts-his kneecaps are clearly visible in nearly every pair of shorts he has, but I'm not buying more summer clothes in August! Sorry, kid. I see skinny jeans in his future, as regular jeans won't fit his long and lean frame.

He seems so old to me!! He thinks he's getting old too...lately if you ask him how old he is, he says, "I'm six old!" He used to give the correct answer, but not anymore. If you really press him on it, he'll demote himself to five, but he is most certainly NOT two!

He went through a very fearful phase last month, but things seem to be getting better lately. Bedtime was hell for a bit, but some new rituals seem to have helped. We do a "scary check" each night, he recites/chants a version of Psalm 4:8 a few times (In peace, O Lord, I will sleep, for you keep me safe) and now, he sleeps with the door OPEN! I'm not sure how this open door thing is gonna work when he can hear a crying baby or when we move, but for now, I'll do whatever it takes for an easier bedtime. We also talk a LOT about what different sounds are and the things that do scare him.

He is very, very inquisitive and HATES to hear "I don't know." as a response to any of his questions....and he has a LOT of questions. I've just started coming up with any ol' answer lately.

His imagination cracks me up! I just love hearing him play with his toys! He has been taking care of "sister" lately. She is sad and cries, but he makes it all better. Sweet, sweet boy!

He has become even more social. He still loves church and the Y and has no problem being left. In fact, sometimes he doesn't even tell me bye! He no longer enjoys going to parks or playgrounds if he is the only one there. We went to Chick-Fil-A one morning this week to kill some time before an appointment and there was no one there. He said, "Where's Hannah Kate? Where's Big Kids?" and didn't want anything to do with the play area!

Running errands is super hit or miss. Some days, he is very compliant, doesn't mind sitting in the cart, listens and behaves. Other days, it's a battle to just get out of the car. There is no rhyme or reason for which kid I'm going get.

Makafui super needs Man Time lately! It's funny to watch your little boy grow and have him suddenly crave and need something that you simply cannot provide. He asks for Pops and Daddy all the time and if he doesn't get enough of that male input, he gets very aggressive and difficult for me to handle. I am so looking forward to our patch of grass and extra time with Daddy when we move.

The boy has a ton of personality and occasionally enough attitude for several kids...or adults for that matter! His latest demands include:
"Stop guys! Stop!" When people are talking too loud or interrupting him.
"Don't tell me I don't know!" Well, when we don't know.
"Don't talk to my Mommy like that!" When he hears animated conversations, but doesn't understand what is being said exactly. Ha!
"I don't wanna songgggg!!!" In the car, when he is grumpy, do not turn the radio on.
"Don't say mhhhmmm to me, you say, yes, that's right!" The boy easily perceives when he's not getting the full attention he desires.

Yes, he keeps us on our toes.

He has also been a total trooper lately! I have been packing up the apartment, so I can stress less and spend more time with him in our final weeks and more time with Baby in her first weeks. There have been days that he watches Netflix for longer than he should or just follows me around while I box, organize, sort, etc. I'm sure it can be very unsettling for him, but overall, he's doing awesome!

I think one of my favorite things he does lately is ask G about work. George wants/needs something called TQLs in his position. Somewhere along the way, Makafui learned this and asks George each and everyday if he got any TQLs. It is so adorable. He cheers for him if the answer is yes, comforts him if the answer is no and prays that "Daddy gets fibe TQLs!" I just love it.

In the last two days, he has decided clothes are totally optional. Weird. He strips his PJs off in the morning, sometimes battles getting dressed, and again strips his clothes off when we come home. I don't really get it.

He is so full of life and joy and surprises! I am so blessed to be his Mama!!

It's Baby Month!!!!

I woke up this morning and it instantly hit me that it's August!



I am so. flippin. excited.

We meet our girl this month!!

I have been packing like a mad woman this week! If I feel good one day, I jump on it, since I don't know what the next day may hold or when this precious girl will make her debut. I really want to enjoy my final days with JUST Makafui and my first days with both of them and not be freaking out about packing. So we're going to have a dining room full of boxes for the next 5 weeks, but I just don't even care! And, I feel pretty badass that I did all of this all by myself, while 9 months pregnant and caring for a toddler. Boom.





I've been trying to soak up extra time with M and do fun things with him. He's had a pretty whiney week. I can't tell if he senses big changes are coming or if he is just being two!








Earlier this week I got that terrible I-want-this-baby-to-come-right-now bug. I'm calming down a bit and striving for patience. I'm focusing these next weeks on praying for her, our family and her delivery.

It hit me last night that I should probably prepare a bit more for her actual delivery. I don't know if I am just in denial of what natural childbirth really is, or if God has given me peace about what's on the horizon. I haven't been over-thinking it or worried about it too much. She's coming regardless, so I'd rather not be anxious about it. :)

I am really, really excited to meet this little person! It's so fun not being a first timer and going into this transition having a better understanding of not only how challenging things may be, but how completely wonderful it's going to be! I just can't wait to study her and learn her and see how God has perfectly made her for our family!

HAPPY BABY MONTH!!