Change in Plans

At my 28 week check-up this week, I learned that the AMAZING Labor and Delivery department at the hospital where M was born, the very hospital I was so excited to have this baby in, is CLOSING!!!

Wait, what?

A big medical group imploded financially, laid off a ton of people and closed their OB clinic, which basically leaves my Dr. as the only OB at the hospital. So while the hospital recruits and revamps, they are just closing L&D for the next 6-8 months.

This means we have to go to a different a hospital. :(

Maybe I am a super control freak or maybe all moms feel this way, but I am way bummed about this. I loved my experience with the hospital where M was born! I was looking forward to having that again. To knowing what was going to happen and what is considered normal there. On top of that, the hospital was state of the art, had all the bells and whistles, was very forward thinking in terms of pro-mother/baby care, is award winning and nationally recognized for safety....I could go on and on. I love that place.

George and I toured the "new" hospital yesterday. It was quaint. My biggest concern (that they take baby after birth and shuffle them to a nursery for "assessments"  like 1982) was put to rest; thankfully, they do everything in room. Other things I noticed started to sink in later, like as I was going to bed and having a little cry about it. Things like, there are no bells and whistles, at all. The rooms are pretty small. The equipment seems dated. There is no real NICU, just some baby warmers.

I'm still wrapping my head around this change in plans and thinking about what other options I have. I realize, many of the things are just fluff, fluff I won't care about with babe in arms. And yes, this is suuuuch a First World problem. This second though, it matters to me...a lot.

I was never really in control of this birth, I just thought I had more control since there was some familiarity to it. Time for more trusting, more letting go.